Week 32

32 Weeks with WW (Weight Watchers)

27 lb.'s lost to date

this week's numbers -.6

Sitting outside the grocery store Karlie quietly surveyed her lunch and logged it by hand in her tracker book. 7 points sandwich, 1 point yogurt, 2 points spring rolls, and 0 points on her one soda for the day. She was wide awake and so worn down at the same time. What she could really use was a swim, but she just couldn't find it in herself to spend the money. Even though it was equal to the price of the sandwich she was eating.

She wasn't entirely sure why it was so hard to make the right choice sometimes. She felt like a bad Godfather quote, "Take the cannoli leave the gun," or whatever it was. Go take a swim and feel invigorated for days or get a sandwich and simply feel full, sandwich it is.

She spent half her time at work trying to find something to do and the other half making up something to do. She walked through the kitchen considering total defiance and not doing any of it. But she'd always been the over reliable type. The king that got saddled with responsibility not because it was her responsibility but because she was the one who stepped up and did things. She was kind and people took advantage of that. She'd even been told it by a total stranger when she was 16. She'd gone to get her nails done for a dance when the manicurist pointed to her palm and said, "You are too nice. People take advantage of you." Now 9 and a half years later she was still that way and wondered if the oriental woman was trying to warn her.

She was too nice and whatever anger, sadness, loneliness, or hurt she felt went right into her mouth and onto her hips. Not to mention thighs, butt, stomach, and arms. She should be running around flaunting he 25 year old body and turning down boys. Instead she'd been a size bigger than her ate at 24 when her boyfriend told her he wouldn't marry her if she didn't change. He had been right, and though angry she'd come to understand his side. How could he enter a marriage where it was almost certain she'd die first? O with someone that without change would be risking her life to have kids? It was a mean thing but it was possibly the best thing he could have done for her.